Yahtzee!

On May 31, 2025, I officiated Kate and Josh’s wedding ceremony at the Pfister Hotel in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

When Kate was a child, she cut her sister Caroline’s hair off while playing pretend wedding, much to her mother’s dismay. Kate joked, “Caroline made a very good groom for a day, but I’m far more excited for my new and real groom, Joshua!”

In fact, humor has been a constant in Kate and Josh’s relationship from the start with Josh’s goofy dating app profile proudly stating, “Dad jokes are the best jokes.” 

Josh recounted to me: “We had our first date in a bar. I can still see her walking into the bar, praying it was her, and knowing without a doubt it was.” Along with the romance, there was a humorous aspect to this first encounter too. Kate and Josh had both lied about their heights with Josh adding an inch and Kate subtracting an inch.

Their shared sense of humor was even key to their relationship winning family approval. When Kate met Josh’s parents and brother Alex at the Met, Kate and Josh made puns back and forth the whole time, cracking each other up and making Josh’s family constantly roll their eyes. Josh’s parents said they knew Kate was the one for Josh because they had the same silly sense of humor. In turn, when Josh visited Kate’s family for the first time, he was a good sport regarding all the pranks they pulled on him.

Humor even factored into expressing their feelings for each other. One Sunday they were trying to figure out what game to play and Kate said, “I love Yahtzee!” Josh mistakenly heard, “I love you!” and was shocked, as they had not been together for long. Neither of them were quite ready to declare their love, but from then on they would say Yahtzee to each other in intimate moments. 

Later that year, Kate and Josh had gone to see a musical and ended up at a 24-hour diner. Kate looked at Josh all dressed up and started crying because she loved him so much. Kate said Yahtzee and Josh told Kate he loved her. They will never forget that sweet moment.

Since then, Kate and Josh have gone on many laughter-filled adventures and created a home filled with love and their adorable puppy, Lulu. 

Kate and Josh, what a sweet tale. What we wish for you is that you continue to share your humor and your love, and that it always feel as fresh as it did that night in the 24-hour diner. 

With that, let’s move on to your vows. Yahtzee!

You are Mine

On May 18, 2025, I officiated Liat and Trey’s wedding ceremony at The Windsor at Hebron Park in Carrollton, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Fun fact: The only person speaking the truth when they call Liat by her name is Trey. Li means mine, and at means you. Liat, therefore, means you are mine. 

When I think of that fact and of Liat and Trey’s relationship, a concept I never before had the words for comes to mind: Innocent excitement. 

What is innocent excitement? It describes a feeling of joyful anticipation or thrill that is pure, unburdened, and free from any ulterior motives or negative connotations.

It combines the purity associated with having no guilt, wrongdoing, or bad intentions, with the feeling of intense energy, anticipation, and enthusiasm.

This is well evident in how Liat and Trey speak of each other, their history together, and their relationship.  

Liat says, “There are several reasons why I want to marry Trey. First and foremost, Trey knows how to make me smile, he knows how to make me laugh so hard that my stomach hurts. Trey also knows how to make me feel safe. Trey has shown me that he loves me for me and doesn’t take me for granted. He has never judged me. He has always been there for me and has always loved me. I love you Trey with all of my heart. I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you.”

And Trey says, “There are several reasons why I would like to marry Liat.  First and foremost is her kind heart and devotedness toward me through thick and thin. She cares for and loves my whole family. She has never judged me for who I am.  She has guided me to be a better person…  Liat and I had a special bond.  Through all the turmoil I have gone through… she was and has always been there for me… I love you Liat with all my heart. I cannot wait to spend the rest of my life with you.”

Liat and Trey, what we wish for you is that your innocent excitement continue to manifest itself throughout your marriage. Through that, your bond will be unbreakable.

And Here They Stand

On Saturday, May 10, 2025, I officiated Alyse and Aaron’s wedding ceremony at the Dallas Arboretum (Jonsson Family Color Garden) in Dallas, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Aaron uses very interesting language when he describes what happened when they got together: “I felt at ease with her almost immediately...” Hearing this, I couldn’t help but think of the words of Sarah McLachlan, “Loving you is easy, loving you is wondrous and pure.” If you know Alyse and Aaron, you know this speaks to their mutual love. 

Alyse, in words that Aaron could have written too, describes what this relationship has done for both of them: “I didn’t realize how much better everything would be when I got to do it with Aaron. I am so grateful we met as soon as we did, because now no amount of time feels like it could ever be enough.” Again, Sarah McLachlan’s words speak to this: “Oh the fury of desire, you burn so bright, electrify, you light me up, you take me higher.”

One of the best aspects of Alyse and Aaron’s relationship is their differences and how they have dealt with their differences. Not only do these differences between them not hurt their relationship. They enhance it. 

Aaron says: “We make each other better people. We have different skill sets, but we complement each other… Being with Alyse gives me a drive and sense of purpose that was missing.” This might be the most important thing we can do for each other. After all, as the Stoics remind us, though we mostly concern ourselves with health, wealth, and reputation, the only thing we really have control over is our virtue and the sense of purpose that our virtue can impart on us. 

Alyse sums it up: “I always said I would only marry someone if they were TRULY perfect for me…”

And here they stand.

That Deep Love

On Sunday, May 4, 2025, I officiated Kat and Billy’s wedding ceremony at Silo & Oak in Temple, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Kat says, “Billy and I met on May 5, 2023, after many close calls,” which sounds vaguely ominous, but I don’t think she meant it that way. 

Kat continues: “He was friends with my brother since 2018, and I would always hear the name ‘Lux’. Billy had… visited my parents’ house a few times… when I wasn’t around… I was looking forward to finally meeting Lux just to put a face to his name… Billy walked in, and his presence instantly attracted me. He engaged in a conversation with my dad… As he was about to leave, he asked me about the Cuban coffee I was preparing for myself and that became a two-hour conversation. I didn’t think much of it as I didn’t know his relationship status and he was stationed in Texas.”

Billy picks up the story from there: “In 2023, I took leave from flight school and went back to Miami for a graduation. While there I bought a truck and asked a friend to leave it at my house. That single event changed the course of my life. That night I met his sister and after hours of conversation, we both knew something was there.”

Billy continues: “Kat came to explore Austin and met me as her guide. I was showing her the Tanakh, the Hebrew Scriptures… I opened a random page as we discussed it and saw this verse: 

בִּטְח֘וּ־ב֤וֹ בְכׇל־עֵ֨ת ׀ עָ֗ם שִׁפְכֽוּ־לְפָנָ֥יו לְבַבְכֶ֑ם אֱלֹהִ֖ים מַחֲסֶה־לָּ֣נוּ סֶֽלָה׃”

Trust in Him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts before Him; God is our refuge.” 

I viewed it as a sign from above and took a leap of faith. Ever since that leap, we have both had a stronger connection than we could ever imagine.” Kat confirms: “I arrived to Texas as a single woman and left Texas in a relationship.”

Kat and Billy’s ethical spiritual beliefs are complementary. Billy says, “I try to live my life by my simple summation of the 10 commandments of ‘Don’t be an a**hole’. Everything I do, I try to do with consideration to not negatively impact anyone around me.” 

This is, in fact, the way the Ancient Rabbis discuss the Golden Rule. While Jesus uses the positive, do unto others as you would like done unto you, the Rabbis say, what you do not like done to you, do not do to others.

There is an important prerequisite to this, though. What if you don’t really like yourself? You might not care what people do to you, and thus your behavior towards others might suffer. This idea has been central to Kat’s thinking. She says, short and sweet: “Before I dedicated myself to any religion, I made sure I had a good relationship with myself.”

Kat and Billy, may you both continue to love yourselves love each other, and love others. May your conduct, in good times and in bad, emanate from that deep love.

Journey to Bashert

On Friday, May 2, 2025, I officiated Cara and Ross’s wedding ceremony at Firefly Gardens in Midlothian, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

I ask every person I marry to write an autobiographical essay. Very few of these are given a title. Ross’s essay is one of those few, and he uses a Yiddish word in it no less, “My Journey to Bashert.”  File that away for now. We will get back to it.

Cara zeroes in on a common problem today in America: “My sister and I moved to Dallas during Covid, and two weeks in I thought I’d made a huge mistake. We decided to get a puppy, which helped, but making friends as an adult proved to be harder than I’d thought. A friend of mine suggested downloading a dating app as a way to meet people.” 

Here is where it takes an unexpected turn: “Being a girl who listens to a lot of true crime, I wasn’t thrilled at the prospect of meeting a stranger from the internet. I was however, convinced, and the first date I agreed to (after quite a bit of online research, of course) was with Ross.”

Ross speaks to the nature of that first dates: “My life took a transformative turn the day I met Cara. I vividly remember seeing her for the first time as I waited outside of the Katy Trail Icehouse entrance to greet her on our first date. She was walking across the street in the wrong direction, clearly lost and confused (being new to the area), with a cute bubbly cadence and looked absolutely stunning. 

I called her to help navigate to the restaurant, where we met with a hug and laughed about the unconventional route she took to get there. I felt immediately drawn to her warmth, energy and sense of humor.”

Ross notes the special nature of that date: “Our first date was unlike any other… We were instantaneously comfortable with each other, and sat outside in the Texas summer heat for over 4 hours enthralled in deep conversation. It was inherently clear that I met someone special and I could not wait to see her again the moment we said goodbye.”

Cara says, “I called my friend immediately after, and she called it before anyone: I was going to marry this man. Now, I can’t believe there was ever a time I didn’t have Ross in my life. Though it’s just been three and a half years, I feel like in that time so much has changed, and I really love the people we are today.” 

Ross agrees. He says, “The decision to propose to Cara was driven by my inability to imagine life without her. She is the first thing I think about when I wake up, and my last thought before I fall asleep with hopes she will be in my dreams.”  

Back to what we started with. Ross says, “When I told Cara’s Grandpa Bobby that I was going to propose, he was filled with joy and taught me the Yiddish term ‘bashert’.” Indeed, bashert is usually interpreted as meant to be, in general, or more specifically when referring to our romantic relationships, as soulmate. I love this interpretation, but it misses one thing, and that is our action and our free will. 

I believe a more nuanced view is necessary. Fate or luck or the universe may bring us to certain crossroads in our lives, but if we just leave it there, we won’t get far. What we need to do, in many things great or small, is to take that fate and through our actions forge it into destiny.

This is what Cara and Ross have done. As Ross says, “Our partnership has deepened immensely over time through meaningful experiences and overcoming obstacles, which have both taught us how to love each other to the fullest extent. While the ups and downs are both better with Cara, the “normal” days are just as meaningful to me.” 

Cara agrees, and she says: “I really love the people we are today. We’ve weathered a few hiccups, celebrated so many accomplishments, and worked really hard to build each other up as we’re creating a really beautiful life… I cannot wait to make the commitment of my lifetime to the love of my life in front of all of our closest friends and family, to step into the next chapter of life and getting to love Ross for the rest of my life.”

In Praise of Truancy

On Friday, March 7, 2025, I officiated Juliana and Sacha’s wedding ceremony at the Marigny Opera House in New Orleans, Louisiana. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

I don’t think I have begun these remarks with this type of statement before: Juliana and Sacha’s love story speaks to the benefits of truancy. I see the raised eyebrows. Stay with me. It will make sense in a moment. 

Sacha says, “In the fall semester of my sophomore year of college in 2014 is where I met my wife Julz. Every Thursday, one of my classes had a film screening on a culturally classic film. I would skip this class quite often to play some soccer with my friends in the Boston Gardens. During one of these sessions, a friend of ours said he invited this cool chick he met during one of his classes. When going down the path to the Gardens, I saw Julz…” 

Juliana speaks to the magic of that moment: “Sacha does not believe me but I swear it was love at first sight for me, when I saw him I immediately was drawn to him. From that moment I showed my interest in him, we became closer friends and long story short we got together at 19 and never looked back.”

The impression they made on each other was mutual. Sacha says, “One of the first things I noticed was her smile. I decided to sit out playing soccer and just sit down with her and her friends. We hit it off immediately and instantly loved her energy, I found myself wanting to be around her all the time. At one point, she didn’t have her phone for a week and I stopped by her room almost everyday to see if she was there and if not, I would leave her a post it note.”

From the beginning, her relationship with Sacha had a profound effect on Juliana and helped her find herself. She says: “I began college a semester later than Sacha, so I entered my freshmen year still searching for my friend group where I would fit in and have the space to discover and be my true authentic self. I took a semester off to rediscover who I was after high school, that semester off and my first semester at Emerson was a pivotal year of discovering who I wanted to be. I met Sacha my second semester of college and at that time I was feeling confident in who I was and proud of the work I have done. Meeting Sacha felt like a gift given to me for that journey and he solidified that dream of the woman I was becoming.”

That sense of mutual growth and self-actualization has never stopped. In that sense, this moment is a capstone to their love story. Juliana says: “Being with Sacha since I was 19 meant we have had many life moments together and grew together. We always knew we would get married and now getting closer to 30 we felt that it was time to celebrate all those years of love together and enter true adulthood to plan the rest of our lives.”

Sacha agrees: “We have now been together for over ten years and it's again another joyous chapter of my life. After being together for a third of our lives, getting to an age where adulthood felt cemented, it made sense to take the next step into our relationship; making it official not just in the eyes of the law, but through a joyful and spiritual celebration of our union with all of our friends and family. Ten years is quite an achievement and celebrating our love feels natural to us.”

Sacrificial Love

On Saturday, February 22, 2025, I officiated Crystal and Michael’s wedding ceremony at St. Stephen's Catholic Church in Midland, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Crystal and Michael stress threads common to both of their upbringings when they talk about their parents.

Michael says: “As a veteran of the Yom Kippur War, my father chose to raise his two sons in the US. My father was a hard worker and willing to make many sacrifices for his family. He received his dental license in Poland but drove a taxi when coming to the US to study for his licensing in the US. My father left an impression on me to work hard to achieve what you want even though it may not be the shortest path.”  

Crystal says: “My mom and dad worked really hard to provide for my brother and myself. They were so young and had many financial struggles. My dad became a licensed electrician to provide for his family and my mom worked as a bookkeeper at a bank… My parents always wanting better for my brother and me.”

This love that their parents showed towards them is what we would call sacrificial love, and this idea is common to both of their religious traditions. In Christianity this idea is quite obvious, and it is exemplified in Jesus’ sacrifice. In Judaism, we see an example of this in the mystical idea of tzimtzum, literally contraction or withdrawal, in which God whose presence is everywhere, contracts to make room for creation.

Sacrificial love is central to marriage. In marriage, two people, each with their own characteristics, their own strengths and weaknesses, come together to form a union grounded in love. However, in order to thrive, each must not only take sustenance from the marriage, but give of themselves, so the other might thrive, so that the new being that comes to life, their marriage, may succeed. 

Crystal and Michael, what we hope for you is that you continue to follow your parents’ lessons, and that you love for each other be emblematic of God’s love for you. In this, may you find true happiness.

Endlessly Grateful

On Friday, December 20, 2024, I officiated Jessica and Stephen’s wedding ceremony at the 4 Eleven in Fort Worth, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Jessica and Stephen teach us two important lessons, the power of good fortune, the good fortune they found in meeting each other, and the importance of a concrete foundation of friendship in the life of every romantic couple, a foundation they carefully cultivated at the beginning of their relationship.

Stephen describes the genesis of their relationship: “In August of 2022, Jessica came in to interview for a bartender position at the bar I was managing. We quickly became friends, though initially, I wasn’t ready for a romantic relationship… Fortunately, Jessica was patient, and we built a solid foundation of friendship over the next several months.” 

Jessica describes how they built that solid foundation: “We went on platonic dates, to the State Fair of Texas (where he assumed I knew my way around—I didn’t, and he would unintentionally lose me around corners), to concerts, where I assumed the role of passenger princess and requested unnecessary stops at In ‘N Out, to taking me out to lunch at Enchiladas Ole, when my cat (PB) was sick, and he knew I was at home worrying my head off, to then helping me chase said sick cat around my apartment because of a mandatory IV drip that had to be given because even the vet could not wrangle her. We bonded over shared experiences and small moments, and he made me laugh with his sense of humor. He also became a formidable foe in Wordle and remains one today.”

Jessica also describes what changed their relationship: “On Christmas Eve, 2022, my flight to visit my best friend was canceled due to an airline debacle, and Stephen invited me to spend the holiday with his family. Their warmth and hospitality were unforgettable, and that night marked a turning point in our relationship.”

Stephen confirms this, when he says, “We eventually started dating in February 2023. We moved in together shortly after.” And he adds, “It didn’t take long to know that I wanted to marry Jessica. By the time I was 35, I had a clear understanding of what I wanted in life, and she checked all the boxes… I knew that she was the one for me. In the spring of 2024, I proposed to her… I’m still not sure what I did to deserve so much love from such an amazing person, but I’m not going to question it.”

Jessica reflects this sentiment right back to Stephen: “Life hasn’t always been easy, but the challenges I’ve faced have shaped me into the person I am today… Meeting Stephen feels like a culmination of everything I’ve learned about love, resilience, and self-discovery. He came into my life at precisely the right time, and together, we’re building a future that feels hopeful and full of possibility… I am endlessly grateful…”.

Height of Serendipity

On Saturday, December 14, 2024, I officiated Julia and Matt’s wedding ceremony at The Breakers Palm Beach in Palm Beach, Florida. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Julia and Matt meeting each other was the height of serendipity. Julia says: “Matt and I met in Florida, when I was on vacation with my family one weekend. He was living there at the time as his work in solar moved him to the Sunshine State.” Matt adds: “Julia and I met in downtown Delray. I was out because my friend was DJing and of course Jules was there because she loves to dance. I actually almost didn’t go because I was exhausted from working all week but something inside me knew it was going to be a special time.” 

Julia says, “We locked eyes and started chatting. Matt was looking at me all night. I remember being instantly drawn to his goofy energy and his loud laugh.” Matt says that he noticed this pretty, tall, blonde girl kept staring at him and so he decided to take his best shot. Julia disputes this: “Matt will say that I was across the room looking at him, but I swear, he was the one staring at me!” I guess we will never know the truth, but it doesn’t really matter. Something unique happened the day Julia and Matt met. A day hasn’t gone by that they have not spoken ever since.  

Julia remembers being worried about how things would work out as the long-distance posed a tricky obstacle – her living in Connecticut and him living in Florida – but Matt wasn’t worried. The day after they first met, Matt told his mom, Bonnie, and his Uncle Greg that he had met the woman he was going to marry.  

When talking about Julia, Matt says, “She is the most special person I’ve ever met. We are both fiery personalities and when we are together, our flames burn the brightest. She inspires me to want to be a better person for her and our future children. I truly believe we were meant to be.”

When talking about Matt, Julia says: “After I met Matt, I felt like I could finally take a deep breath because everything was going to be okay. He is such a strong person and not just physically, although his muscles are easy on the eyes! His big smile and silly laugh always remind me not to take life or myself too seriously. I know that life with Matt will always be a beautiful adventure.” 

She adds that “Matt makes me feel understood, seen, loved, and safe…Well not always safe… like the time when he took me fishing on a boat in the middle of the ocean in the pouring rain with ten-foot waves and then caught a shark.”

In all seriousness, though, feeling seen may be the most important thing partners can do for each other. As Kirk Pineda writes, “Feeling seen is a state in which a part (or parts) of our identity, emotions, needs, and physical being are fully recognized and reflected back to us by another.” Julia and Matt, may you continue to mutually feel seen, loved, and at least while on dry land, safe too.

Listen to Your Heart

On Saturday, December 7, 2024, I officiated Brielle and Jared’s wedding ceremony at Rancho Luna Escondido in San Miguel de Allende, México. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Brielle describes the genesis of their relationship: “A little more than three years ago, my life took a turn for the better when I swiped right on Bumble and Jared, and I matched. As a huge fan of reality TV, particularly Bravo shows, I was immediately drawn to his profile when I saw that he shared this interest. We both were not great at responding on the apps, and Jared gave me his number to text.” 

Jared picks up the story from there: “When Brielle and I first started talking, I noticed she ended every sentence with at least one exclamation mark—sometimes up to five or six. I was struck by how upbeat and happy she seemed, even through text. I wouldn’t describe myself as the most cheerful person, so interacting with someone so genuinely positive was captivating. I later realized that this was her natural demeanor—she's truly one of the happiest people I've ever met.”

Their first date almost didn’t happen. Brielle says, “We started to text and tried to arrange a date. Jared had to reschedule our date…twice and even suggested that I could opt out if I wished. I joked and said, ‘Wow, already trying to get out of meeting me.’ As I joked, I figured why not try once more. Something in my gut told me to meet him, and I am grateful I followed that instinct.”

Following that instinct truly paid off. As Jared says, “Brielle and I have spent the last three years building a life together, sharing incredible highs and navigating serious lows... Throughout it all, we've been each other’s support system, confidant, cheerleader, and best friend. I truly couldn’t imagine a better partner or a happier life. I wake up every day feeling incredibly lucky and grateful to have found her.”

Brielle agrees: “Jared is my best friend, my soul mate, my home, and my partner in every adventure. We love exploring the world together, trying out restaurants as well as going to our usuals, watching movies, plays, and musicals, playing games… and simply enjoying each other’s company. Whether we are working out, taking walks, or binge-watching TV shows, every moment spent with him is filled with happiness, laughter, and even more love…” 

As a child of the 80s, I believe the lesson Brielle and Jared teach us is simple to me, as the Swedish duo Roxette put it years ago: 

“Listen to your heart

When he's calling for you

Listen to your heart

There's nothing else you can do

I don't know where you're going

And I don't know why

But listen to your heart

Before you tell him goodbye”

Thank you, Brielle and Jared, for this valuable lesson. Thank you for listening to your heart. May we all learn from your example.

Whatever Gets You Going

On Sunday, September 29, 2024, I officiated Naomi and Alex’s wedding ceremony at the Springs Denton (The Lodge), in Aubrey, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

A little more than 600 weddings in, these remarks have never included product placements. Naomi and Alex’s story doesn’t really begin without one. We are not talking about a particularly romantic brand. Its motto is somewhat utilitarian: Whatever gets you going.

Naomi says: “We graduated high school in 2012 and fell out of touch all together. In 2015 my grandma came into town, and she needed (note “needed” not “wanted”) a soda and a lotto ticket, so we went to Race Trac. I saw Alex behind the counter and had butterflies instantly. He looked like a deer in the headlights. 

I didn't give him my number because I didn't want to in front of my grandma. I went back the next day, and he wasn't there, and I went every day for a whole week, and he wasn't there. A coworker of his told me on the sixth day he was out of town and would be back tomorrow for the graveyard shift. That night I went up there, gave him my number, and we started to date shortly after that.”

Can we pause for a minute for the co-workers who waited until she had visited six days before telling her he was out of town? What’s up with that?! Whatever gets you going apparently means whatever gets you coming back…

What Naomi and Alex teach us, though, is the importance of persistence, of showing up, of going after what you want to get, as individuals and as a couple. They also teach us the importance of acceptance and mutual growth and support. 

Indeed, when describing why she wants to get married, Naomi says: “My love for Alex since then has grown into such a strong, indescribable feeling. There is no one on this planet who accepts me and loves me like he does. There is no one I feel this safe with, that I can talk to like we do, and helps me grow each day like he does. He has helped me during my darkest times showing me there is a reason for everything and to always move forward. When I picture my future, I don't see anyone else but him… Alex radiates this happiness most people look for their whole lives. I love him so much.” 

And Alex says: “We have pushed each other to grow in ways that I do not think would have happened without each other. I have only become a better person since choosing to spend my life with her. She is simply the love of my life, and I can't imagine life without her. In my mind she is already my wife and has been for years… We know each other inside and out. Our love has only gotten stronger over the years... If there's one thing in this world, I'm sure of, it's my love for Naomi.”

Strength, Stability, and Peace

On Saturday, September 28, 2024, I officiated Stephanie and George’s wedding ceremony at the Carlisle Room in Dallas, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Stephanie and George’s meeting began pretty conventionally. Stephanie says: “George and I met online through Bumble. Since women message first on the app, I wanted to make an impression right off the bat. My very first message to George was sending him a random number and telling him to remember it. He was very confused about what this number meant and eventually I told him that the number I shared with him was my ring size. To be fair, I had seen a video on social media about the best pick-up lines for dating apps. This goes to show that you can always trust what you read on social media because here we are!”

George describes the setting: “We arranged our first date in Deep Ellum.” I feel like first date in Deep Ellum is definitely a different vibe than first date in downtown or uptown. “The connection was instant. I felt such a clear signal that there was something special between us. Possibly the funniest thing that we bonded over that night was how we both loved ketchup on pizza. I mean talk about find the One!”

George leaves out a crucial detail. Stephanie adds, “George decided to take me axe throwing for our first date. I was very excited to go but incredibly nervous that my throwing skills would make the axe turn into a boomerang.” Like I said, Deep Ellum is just a different vibe…

Stephanie adds about that night and what followed, “I knew George was the one when we immediately started dancing together, without even saying anything, and it felt like we had been dancing together for years. The more I got to know George, the more I fell in love with him. His genuineness and kindhearted spirit drew me in instantly.”

George says about that time, “We fell deeper and deeper in love. The more time we spent together, the more it just made sense and at some point, it became impossible to imagine a future without her in my life. Not only did I fall in love with Steph, but also her family and her history.”

Stephanie sums it up when she says, “I cannot wait to love him as a husband and a father to our children. He makes me the happiest person on the planet. My inner child and I feel safest when we are with him. Not only do we feel his love but also his support of working on my continual relationship with her.”

And George agrees, “I know that in Steph, I have found my soulmate and the person who completes me in ways I could have never imagined. She is a beautiful and radiant woman that loves making others laugh and sharing meaningful conversations and experiences. Her kindness is like no one else’s. She constantly reminds me that it’s okay to relax because life is better when it isn’t so serious. In her, I’ve seen so much strength, stability, and peace.”

Happy Accident

On Saturday, September 21, 2024, I officiated Stephanie and Chris’ wedding ceremony at the Renaissance Dallas at Plano Legacy West Hotel in Plano, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Stephanie describes the genesis of this relationship as a happy accident: “I was looking for a date for a formal and as a modern young person I turned to Tinder. His picture came up and I swiped right on him and he sent me a message. Who knew it would be the best thing to ever happen to me? Something told me he was different than all the other people I had talked to and dated. He seemed to be quite clever and a good person.”

The attraction was mutual. As Chris says, “We initially met online, and quickly decided after communicating for a short time to go on a date. Our first date was when we really got to know each other… We… had a long and wonderful first date, near where we are getting married.”

The special feeling of that first date was mutual. As Stephanie says, “We went out on our first date and I had felt like I knew him for months when we had only been talking/FaceTiming for less than 2 weeks. When we met in person, I felt something I had never felt before. I felt a genuine connection and shortly after that date I asked him to my formal and we started dating.”

What is the secret of this relationship? Once you get to know Stephanie and Chris, it’s almost self-evident. They have each experienced hardships in life, hardships that have severely tested them. Despite these hardships they have persevered and even flourished. And their relationship has been a rock that has helped them persevere. They have mutually understood and supported each other through it all. 

This is why Chris says, “My love for Steph had only grown the longer we spent together.”  This is why Stephanie says, “I cannot wait to see what the future brings.”

Unique as a Snowflake

On Saturday (7/6), I officiated Nanette and Paul’s wedding ceremony at Ashton Gardens in Corinth, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Nanette and Paul share such a beautiful love story. It is love that comes from a maturity not possessed by the young. It is a seasoned love. (Don’t call us old; we are not. We are seasoned!)

In speaking of the initial phase of their relationship, Nanette says, “I found him to be intelligent, articulate, and charming. We would laugh and talk very intimately about feelings and experiences…” 

And Paul says, “I… immediately felt a closeness that was hard for me to explain… We found that we shared so many core values in common… It seemed to me that I was speaking to someone I had known for a very long time… It was almost a de javu experience… With Nanette, I feel safe and comforted... She has an innocence, sophistication, and charm that delights me…”

Nanette observes, “I've learned some very important lessons with Paul. The most important is what love is and how to share it…“ Indeed, in such a seasoned love, we discover that “what love is” has a very different answer than it may in earlier years, when we might be more superficial about our love. 

Paul clarifies: “I observed to Nanette early in our relationship after we had spent the day running around doing errands that I just enjoyed doing the mundane with her… There is joy in the simple things that I love about our relationship…” That, indeed, is what seasoned love is all about.

Such a seasoned love helps us discover perspectives about ourselves we never saw. As Nanette says, “Paul has shown me a different definition for love. He has been patient and respectful. He is generous with his affection and kindness. He sees me in a way that I have never seen myself and loves me, even the broken parts.”   

It is this kind of love that deserves to be celebrated by cementing it through marriage. As Paul says, “I want to marry Nanette because I want us to continue to love, laugh, and enchant each other for the rest of our days… I want to publicly proclaim my love for her, to share our love story with our friends and family. I believe that all love is as unique as a snowflake, each beautiful in its way.”

Lucky in Love

On Friday, June 28, 2024, I officiated Nancy and Charles’s wedding ceremony at their home in Princeton, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Nancy and Charles met in high school. They didn’t hang out in the same circles, but Charles thought she was friendly, funny, and cute. From there, they each went their separate ways. That could have been the end of the story. We might not be here if not for another fellow Jew, Mark Zuckerberg. 

As Nancy and Charles write, “We resumed our friendship about five years ago with infrequent messaging via Facebook.  A little over a year ago, we began talking every night and we stayed up to one o’clock in the morning often speaking in different time zones. We both seemed to effortlessly fall in love.”

They not only fell in love; they found so much in common with each other. Charles writes, “We seldom if ever disagree… we tend to always get to the same endpoint although the paths we take are often different.” They talk about being each other’s best friend, and cherishing doing both the mundane and the extravagant together, equally.  Charles gleefully admits that he learns so much from Nancy and he looks forward to continuing that process.   

Nancy writes, “We are so lucky to have fallen in love. Consequently, I cannot wait to see what amazing things our future together holds.” That reminded me of that immortal song, “Lucky in Love”. No, not the Mick Jagger song, the one by Tommy Castro. This speaks exactly to what Nancy is saying:

“Lady luck she never looks my way, turns her back when it's my turn to play, but I'm lucky in love, I'm so lucky in love.

Never had much luck with the dice, I like to play but can't pay the price, oh I'm lucky, baby, lucky in love. I'm so lucky, lucky in love...

When it comes to lovin' I'm no beginner, in my baby's arms you know that I'm a winner, in lovin', I'm such a lucky man, when I hold my baby, I hold a winnin' hand

I got a roof that leaks, a floor that squeaks, a car that breaks down every two or three weeks, but I'm lucky, lucky in love, I'm lucky now, baby, I'm lucky in love, that's what I am, I'm so lucky, I'm lucky in love.”

Nancy and Charles, may Tommy’s words continue to embody your relationship, and may you enjoy many many years together, lucky in love.

A Very Highly Regarded Entity

On Tuesday, June 18, 2024, I officiated Kristin and Henry’s wedding ceremony at their home in Garland, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Jackie Mason, who like me was ordained and served as an Orthodox rabbi, once said that every Jewish parent wants their child to become a doctor, not that smart (I’m changing what he actually said because the original is too offensive) a lawyer, no brains at all an accountant. I’m not sure where that leaves rabbis or for that matter creatives like you, Kristin and Henry. 

Now, why did I open with this joke? Bear with me. It is about to make sense. I ask every person I marry to write an essay in which they tell me about their life and spiritual history, how they met, why they want to get married and why now. Kristin and Henry’s answer is so romantic, I am going to have to steel myself, so not to cry. Here goes. Kristin and Henry say, “Only now, the state of Texas will treat our jointly owned business as a disregarded entity.” Now, I will admit that I researched this just a little bit, meaning I read a couple of entries on the internet, and for the life of me, I cannot understand what they mean. Then, again, I was not smart enough to become an accountant.

That’s ok, though, because, Kristin and Henry continue. Again, the prompt was why do you want to get married and why now: “Oh, and also because we love each other a lot.” There is more to it, of course. And here is where the disregarded entity stuff actually has a serious side. Kristin and Henry say, “We have started a lot of creative endeavors and are embarking on our business, Shiitake Brains, where Kristin cuts the commercials, and Henry makes the music.”

I truly believe, and this has been true in my relationship with my wife, that working together on a creative endeavor really does add a depth to a relationship that is quite unique. Trish Harp, who has conducted extensive research on this subject, says that “in spite of the roller-coaster ride that defines entrepreneurship, spouses have reported a great feeling that they are on this journey together. There is a strong desire to stick it out… When couples create a shared vision for their future, their satisfaction in all areas of life increases."

What Kristin and Henry realize, though, is that one creative endeavor stands above them all. As Kristin and Henry write, “Our greatest ‘endeavor’ was born in November of 2023 and it has been incredible to learn how to be both parents and partners in every sense of the word.”

Becoming parents trumps becoming business partners. It actually changes our biology. As Abigail Fagan writes, “Becoming a parent changes us deeply. It changes our brain, our behavior, our thoughts, our hormones, our biology, and our body. With awareness and knowledge, this can be a beautiful gift—specialized brains to take care of and bond with our infants, a new period of neuroplasticity where we might find healing for ourselves.”

When you share such a gift together, when you find such healing together, you can approach your wedding and your marriage the way Kristin and Henry do, as an already living and breathing entity, dare I say, a very highly regarded entity, that just needs the final seal of approval. As Kristin and Henry write, “We are getting married at this point in our relationship almost as a formality. We’ve committed our lives to each other already.”

Can’t Argue with Results

On Saturday, May 18, 2024, I officiated Jessica and Joe’s wedding ceremony at the Texas Discovery Gardens in Dallas, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Jessica tells the story of how she and Joe met: “We first met when one of our mutual friends picked me up to grab a drink and Joe was tagging along. Joe claims he said hi, but if you ask me, he never said a word the entire way to the bar. Shocking for him. Once we arrived Joe ordered a round of Jell-O shots, dropped them on the table, and then left, without a word. As Joe likes to say, ‘Can't argue with results!’”

This story is emblematic of Jessica and Joe’s personalities as individuals and as a couple. You see very little ego. They don’t take themselves too seriously. This might sound like a frivolous idea to you, but philosophically, this is very important for the individual human psyche.

More than that, the late great British philosopher, Alan Watts, preached about the importance of this very idea that for the sake of humanity, you must not take yourself too seriously. One might even argue that some of the greatest historic tragedies are due to the fact that people took themselves too seriously.

And not taking yourself too seriously is vital for our interpersonal relationships. The Torah commands us to love our fellow as ourselves. If everyone took this maxim seriously and really followed it, imagine how wonderful life would be. By its very nature, loving the other as we love ourselves necessitates at its very core not taking ourselves too seriously.

The Ancient Rabbis ask a fascinating question: What commandment does one fulfill through love and marriage. Their answer is the very verse I just quoted. The most supreme manifestation of the commandment to love one’s fellow as oneself is through a deep romantic relationship. It is this type of relationship that teaches us that it, and I mean it in the broadest sense possible, is not about us. Thus, don’t take yourself too seriously.

Jessica and Joe, what we wish for you is that you keep that spark that began your relationship, that spark that has stayed with you ever since. Don’t take yourselves too seriously, and through that may you enjoy an ongoing deep love for many years to come.  

A Rainbow in Someone’s Cloud

On Saturday, May 4, 2024, I officiated Holly and Emily’s wedding ceremony at the Addison Grove in Austin, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Emily and Holly’s relationship illuminates the power of connection and the profound impact we have on each other’s lives. It demonstrates how love and shared values can bridge differences and allow us to weather adversity. 

Emily and Holly connected easily, a connection which quickly blossomed into a bond that felt like family. They found in each other not just a partner, but a confidante, and a source of endless laughter. They support each other through adversity, celebrate each other’s achievements, and above all, make each other feel safe and loved.

Emily cherishes Holly’s kindness, patience, and intelligence, and admires her perseverance. Holly found in Emily a partner who is generous, kind, and supportive. They both appreciate each other’s sense of humor and the joy of being silly together. They challenge each other, inspire each other to strive to be better, and constantly align their actions with their shared values.

One of my favorite quotes from Maya Angelou is, “Try to be a rainbow in someone’s cloud.” This quote encapsulates the essence of Holly and Emily’s relationship. They are each other’s rainbow, brightening each other’s lives and providing support through life’s challenges.

Their shared values, family, hard work, and social justice form the foundation of their relationship. Despite their diverse backgrounds and experiences, their values align remarkably well. They trust each other to uphold these values as they navigate life together and embark on the journey of forming a family. They have already weathered many challenges, and their enduring love and trust in each other bolster their confidence to face whatever the future may bring.

Their love story is a beautiful testament to how love can bridge differences and create a bond that is stronger than the sum of its parts. As we celebrate their union today, let us remember the lessons they have taught us about love, resilience, and the power of shared values. May their journey inspire us all to strive for such depth and authenticity in our own relationships. May we all learn to be a rainbow in someone’s cloud.

Shifting Your Mindset

On Saturday, April 6, 2024, Mother Maddie Hill and I co-officiated Bailey and Nate’s wedding ceremony at Bowie House in Fort Worth, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Bailey recounts a wonderful method she grew up with for sussing out if a guy is worth it: “My mom taught me to make a list of qualities in a man, write them down and check on them every once in a while, when dating. My list was: Kind, funny, family man/family oriented, my kind of weird (hard to explain), raised similarly to the way I was, loving supportive parents, and motivated professionally.” 

The Jewish equivalent of this is so much simpler. It goes like this: Are they a doctor, a lawyer, or an accountant? 

Seriously, though, Bailey continues: “This gave me guidelines to find a partner that would not only love me and I love them, but would be a great father to our children, and treat me and his future family with respect. And Nate is that through and through.” That seems like a great lesson for all of us in how we should develop relationships, romantic or otherwise.

Speaking of lessons. Nate shares how meeting Bailey taught him a very important lesson about life, utterly changing him, reordering his priorities, and showing him what was really important: “I am very lucky to have found Bailey. [Before meeting Bailey] I spent… time chasing superficial things of very low value… Every decision was about what would bring me immediate satisfaction… But after coming to Fort Worth and meeting Bailey, my attitude, without me even knowing, changed to what will make me happy in the long term… 

After falling in love with Bailey, my mindset shifted from what I am going to do tomorrow to what I am going to do with her next year and beyond…  I love her very deeply, and I already love the family I picture for us very deeply, and so I want to marry her because I do not see another way to be happy without them.”

And Bailey agrees: “Nate will be a loving husband, a wonderful father, and the funniest weirdest most fun best friend a girl could ever have. I am incredibly lucky to have him by my side for the rest of our lives.”

I Can’t Imagine

On Saturday, March 16th, I officiated Lindsey and Dan’s wedding ceremony at the Brook Hollow Golf Club in Dallas, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

I ask every person I marry to write an autobiographical essay. Though this is meant to help me get to know them better, eventually, the person they are marrying gets to read their essay too. 

With that in mind, you can immediately see how smart Dan is. He writes: “I moved to Dallas at the very end of 2021 from Michigan. Surfing the dating apps, Lindsey and I matched within the first few weeks of me living here. I remember seeing her picture and my jaw literally dropped. ‘Wow!’ I thought, ‘She’s beautiful!’”

Dan made a move, and Lindsey writes: “I was cautiously optimistic about getting together,” which is exactly what you want to hear, as a guy… Why cautiously? Lindsey continues: “Cautiously because he asked me to pick the location of the date, which gave me a little pause about how serious he was, but optimistic because he seemed like a great guy. My best friend Leigh encouraged me to give him a chance and I am so glad she did!”

Dan illuminates: “Since I’d just moved here, I didn’t really know any good spots to take her. I suggested she pick the spot and I would take her there… Thankfully for me, her friend told her to keep an open mind and go, and I’m glad she did. We met for a drink and talked for a few hours. The conversation was easy and I was excited to take her out again. And the rest, as they say, is history.”

There is an incredible lesson here. It might seem almost too obvious, but it is really hard sometimes in any relationship, professional or personal, romantic or platonic, to give the other person the benefit of the doubt. And yet, this might be the most important thing we have to do. 

This certainly worked out for Dan. He says, “Lindsey is an amazing woman and friend. She has a big heart for the people she loves and would do anything for them. She’s incredibly put together… She’s going to be an amazing parent. I’ve… felt with her… a closeness that I’ve never felt with anyone else. She’s also sneakily funny… At the end of the day, she just makes me really happy. I know that I’m a better version of myself when I’m around her, and she’s already improved the man I am…”

This certainly worked out for Lindsey, too. As she says: “I am so excited to get to marry Dan. I feel so at home with him, and I love the life we are building together. I wake up every day excited… I couldn’t imagine my life without Dan, and I feel so lucky that I met him at the right time in both of our lives… I feel so ready to commit our lives to each other because it feels like we already have… I can’t imagine creating any future memories without Dan and I am so excited to call him my husband…”