Can’t Argue with Results

On Saturday, May 18, 2024, I officiated Jessica and Joe’s wedding ceremony at the Texas Discovery Gardens in Dallas, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Jessica tells the story of how she and Joe met: “We first met when one of our mutual friends picked me up to grab a drink and Joe was tagging along. Joe claims he said hi, but if you ask me, he never said a word the entire way to the bar. Shocking for him. Once we arrived Joe ordered a round of Jell-O shots, dropped them on the table, and then left, without a word. As Joe likes to say, ‘Can't argue with results!’”

This story is emblematic of Jessica and Joe’s personalities as individuals and as a couple. You see very little ego. They don’t take themselves too seriously. This might sound like a frivolous idea to you, but philosophically, this is very important for the individual human psyche.

More than that, the late great British philosopher, Alan Watts, preached about the importance of this very idea that for the sake of humanity, you must not take yourself too seriously. One might even argue that some of the greatest historic tragedies are due to the fact that people took themselves too seriously.

And not taking yourself too seriously is vital for our interpersonal relationships. The Torah commands us to love our fellow as ourselves. If everyone took this maxim seriously and really followed it, imagine how wonderful life would be. By its very nature, loving the other as we love ourselves necessitates at its very core not taking ourselves too seriously.

The Ancient Rabbis ask a fascinating question: What commandment does one fulfill through love and marriage. Their answer is the very verse I just quoted. The most supreme manifestation of the commandment to love one’s fellow as oneself is through a deep romantic relationship. It is this type of relationship that teaches us that it, and I mean it in the broadest sense possible, is not about us. Thus, don’t take yourself too seriously.

Jessica and Joe, what we wish for you is that you keep that spark that began your relationship, that spark that has stayed with you ever since. Don’t take yourselves too seriously, and through that may you enjoy an ongoing deep love for many years to come.