And Here They Stand

On Saturday, May 10, 2025, I officiated Alyse and Aaron’s wedding ceremony at the Dallas Arboretum (Jonsson Family Color Garden) in Dallas, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Aaron uses very interesting language when he describes what happened when they got together: “I felt at ease with her almost immediately...” Hearing this, I couldn’t help but think of the words of Sarah McLachlan, “Loving you is easy, loving you is wondrous and pure.” If you know Alyse and Aaron, you know this speaks to their mutual love. 

Alyse, in words that Aaron could have written too, describes what this relationship has done for both of them: “I didn’t realize how much better everything would be when I got to do it with Aaron. I am so grateful we met as soon as we did, because now no amount of time feels like it could ever be enough.” Again, Sarah McLachlan’s words speak to this: “Oh the fury of desire, you burn so bright, electrify, you light me up, you take me higher.”

One of the best aspects of Alyse and Aaron’s relationship is their differences and how they have dealt with their differences. Not only do these differences between them not hurt their relationship. They enhance it. 

Aaron says: “We make each other better people. We have different skill sets, but we complement each other… Being with Alyse gives me a drive and sense of purpose that was missing.” This might be the most important thing we can do for each other. After all, as the Stoics remind us, though we mostly concern ourselves with health, wealth, and reputation, the only thing we really have control over is our virtue and the sense of purpose that our virtue can impart on us. 

Alyse sums it up: “I always said I would only marry someone if they were TRULY perfect for me…”

And here they stand.

That Deep Love

On Sunday, May 4, 2025, I officiated Kat and Billy’s wedding ceremony at Silo & Oak in Temple, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Kat says, “Billy and I met on May 5, 2023, after many close calls,” which sounds vaguely ominous, but I don’t think she meant it that way. 

Kat continues: “He was friends with my brother since 2018, and I would always hear the name ‘Lux’. Billy had… visited my parents’ house a few times… when I wasn’t around… I was looking forward to finally meeting Lux just to put a face to his name… Billy walked in, and his presence instantly attracted me. He engaged in a conversation with my dad… As he was about to leave, he asked me about the Cuban coffee I was preparing for myself and that became a two-hour conversation. I didn’t think much of it as I didn’t know his relationship status and he was stationed in Texas.”

Billy picks up the story from there: “In 2023, I took leave from flight school and went back to Miami for a graduation. While there I bought a truck and asked a friend to leave it at my house. That single event changed the course of my life. That night I met his sister and after hours of conversation, we both knew something was there.”

Billy continues: “Kat came to explore Austin and met me as her guide. I was showing her the Tanakh, the Hebrew Scriptures… I opened a random page as we discussed it and saw this verse: 

בִּטְח֘וּ־ב֤וֹ בְכׇל־עֵ֨ת ׀ עָ֗ם שִׁפְכֽוּ־לְפָנָ֥יו לְבַבְכֶ֑ם אֱלֹהִ֖ים מַחֲסֶה־לָּ֣נוּ סֶֽלָה׃”

Trust in Him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts before Him; God is our refuge.” 

I viewed it as a sign from above and took a leap of faith. Ever since that leap, we have both had a stronger connection than we could ever imagine.” Kat confirms: “I arrived to Texas as a single woman and left Texas in a relationship.”

Kat and Billy’s ethical spiritual beliefs are complementary. Billy says, “I try to live my life by my simple summation of the 10 commandments of ‘Don’t be an a**hole’. Everything I do, I try to do with consideration to not negatively impact anyone around me.” 

This is, in fact, the way the Ancient Rabbis discuss the Golden Rule. While Jesus uses the positive, do unto others as you would like done unto you, the Rabbis say, what you do not like done to you, do not do to others.

There is an important prerequisite to this, though. What if you don’t really like yourself? You might not care what people do to you, and thus your behavior towards others might suffer. This idea has been central to Kat’s thinking. She says, short and sweet: “Before I dedicated myself to any religion, I made sure I had a good relationship with myself.”

Kat and Billy, may you both continue to love yourselves love each other, and love others. May your conduct, in good times and in bad, emanate from that deep love.

Caring Nature

On Saturday, May 3, 2025, I officiated Alyssa and Steven’s wedding ceremony at the Westin Dallas Downtown in Dallas, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Alyssa and Steven’s story goes back years to when they met at the University of Kansas. (Go Jayhawks!) In fact, they were really just good friends for a while before their relationship took a romantic turn.

There is, however, one more recent story, emblematic of their entire relationship that shows that this relationship is special and that they have it made. In fact, this story is reminiscent of a story told about Rabbi Aryeh Levin, nicknamed Hatzadik Hayerushalmi, the Righteous Man of Jerusalem. 

One day Rabbi Aryeh and his wife showed up at the doctor’s office, and the doctor asked what was wrong. The rabbi replied, and this works much better in Hebrew, “We feel pain in my wife’s leg.” Note the exact phrasing; not “My wife feels pain in her leg.” WE feel pain. Rabbi Aryeh’s love for his wife was so great that he felt pain when she felt pain.

No one should have been surprised to hear this from Rabbi Aryeh because this was his general approach to humanity, in general. He was a selfless and caring man. It was no wonder that his approach to his wife would be such.

Steven says of Alyssa that she fits that bill: “I don’t think there is anyone that is more selfless and caring than Alyssa. Even when it makes no sense to me, she will put anyone else first, always lending a hand or making sure other people are taken care of. This is such an important trait for a person to have, and she embodies it to a T.”

And Alyssa tells the story I teased earlier: “One night recently, I cut my finger on a knife pretty bad when I was doing the dishes. He jumped to action to help wrap it up and stop the bleeding. He dropped everything. That night laying in bed, he started crying after I told him how bad my finger hurts. When I asked why he was crying, he told me “Because he I hate not being able to make it better for you. I don’t want you in pain.”

Alyssa and Steven, thank you for this important lesson about true love. May your caring nature for each other and others continue to manifest itself throughout your marriage.

Journey to Bashert

On Friday, May 2, 2025, I officiated Cara and Ross’s wedding ceremony at Firefly Gardens in Midlothian, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

I ask every person I marry to write an autobiographical essay. Very few of these are given a title. Ross’s essay is one of those few, and he uses a Yiddish word in it no less, “My Journey to Bashert.”  File that away for now. We will get back to it.

Cara zeroes in on a common problem today in America: “My sister and I moved to Dallas during Covid, and two weeks in I thought I’d made a huge mistake. We decided to get a puppy, which helped, but making friends as an adult proved to be harder than I’d thought. A friend of mine suggested downloading a dating app as a way to meet people.” 

Here is where it takes an unexpected turn: “Being a girl who listens to a lot of true crime, I wasn’t thrilled at the prospect of meeting a stranger from the internet. I was however, convinced, and the first date I agreed to (after quite a bit of online research, of course) was with Ross.”

Ross speaks to the nature of that first dates: “My life took a transformative turn the day I met Cara. I vividly remember seeing her for the first time as I waited outside of the Katy Trail Icehouse entrance to greet her on our first date. She was walking across the street in the wrong direction, clearly lost and confused (being new to the area), with a cute bubbly cadence and looked absolutely stunning. 

I called her to help navigate to the restaurant, where we met with a hug and laughed about the unconventional route she took to get there. I felt immediately drawn to her warmth, energy and sense of humor.”

Ross notes the special nature of that date: “Our first date was unlike any other… We were instantaneously comfortable with each other, and sat outside in the Texas summer heat for over 4 hours enthralled in deep conversation. It was inherently clear that I met someone special and I could not wait to see her again the moment we said goodbye.”

Cara says, “I called my friend immediately after, and she called it before anyone: I was going to marry this man. Now, I can’t believe there was ever a time I didn’t have Ross in my life. Though it’s just been three and a half years, I feel like in that time so much has changed, and I really love the people we are today.” 

Ross agrees. He says, “The decision to propose to Cara was driven by my inability to imagine life without her. She is the first thing I think about when I wake up, and my last thought before I fall asleep with hopes she will be in my dreams.”  

Back to what we started with. Ross says, “When I told Cara’s Grandpa Bobby that I was going to propose, he was filled with joy and taught me the Yiddish term ‘bashert’.” Indeed, bashert is usually interpreted as meant to be, in general, or more specifically when referring to our romantic relationships, as soulmate. I love this interpretation, but it misses one thing, and that is our action and our free will. 

I believe a more nuanced view is necessary. Fate or luck or the universe may bring us to certain crossroads in our lives, but if we just leave it there, we won’t get far. What we need to do, in many things great or small, is to take that fate and through our actions forge it into destiny.

This is what Cara and Ross have done. As Ross says, “Our partnership has deepened immensely over time through meaningful experiences and overcoming obstacles, which have both taught us how to love each other to the fullest extent. While the ups and downs are both better with Cara, the “normal” days are just as meaningful to me.” 

Cara agrees, and she says: “I really love the people we are today. We’ve weathered a few hiccups, celebrated so many accomplishments, and worked really hard to build each other up as we’re creating a really beautiful life… I cannot wait to make the commitment of my lifetime to the love of my life in front of all of our closest friends and family, to step into the next chapter of life and getting to love Ross for the rest of my life.”

The Power of Serendipity

On Saturday, March 29, 2025, I officiated Taylor and Blake’s wedding ceremony at the Thompson Hotel in Dallas, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Taylor and Blake’s relationship is emblematic of the power of serendipity, and the importance of seizing the opportunity that serendipity gives you.

Their meeting each other is like something out of a movie, and good one at that. Blake says: “Taylor and I met in Chicago about three years after we both moved to the city. It happened to be the first night I moved into my new apartment in West Loop. I wasn’t planning on going out that night after all day of moving, but my friends invited me to dinner and insisted I join. I decided I had earned a drink after the big move and should go out to celebrate. 

Little did I know, a few hours later I would be walking into a bar called Clover. As I walked in, I locked eyes with a beautiful brunette who was sitting with a few people at a table near the entrance. I walked up to her, and without hesitation, said ‘I like your energy.’ Mind you, this wasn’t some line I used routinely when I went out. I had actually never said it before. But knowing Taylor as I do now, I can see why my senses picked up on it. 

Luckily the line didn’t send her running for the door or cause her to tell me to get lost. The truth is, she replied back with a smile and said, ‘Meet me by the pool table.’ After getting a drink, I caught her eye as she was chatting with her friend, somewhat by the pool table. It was close enough that I decided to take her up on the offer. I walked over, introduced myself, and just like that, we were chatting away. The rest, as they say, is history.”

Taylor further underlines the serendipitous nature of their meeting. She says: “I wasn’t even supposed to be out that night, but a friend convinced me to grab a last-minute concert ticket. The bar—Clover—was our last stop of the evening. As I stood at the bar with my friends, a group of guys walked by, one of them being Blake. He looked right at me and said, ‘I like your energy.’ And for reasons I’ll never quite understand, I responded with, ‘Meet me by the pool table...’ 

Eventually, we did end up by the pool table, where Blake proceeded to annihilate me at the game. I was drawn to his confidence and enjoyed our playful banter, especially the part where I told him he really should’ve let me win. For the record, I’m still waiting for him to throw me a bone.”

Taylor picks up the story after that fateful night: “We didn’t have our first official date until two weeks later. He canceled the first one, claiming he was ‘sick,’ and naturally, I thought I’d been blown off. But nope—turns out he was actually sick, not just avoiding me. When we finally did get together, it was like a light switch flipped—we were off to the races and never looked back.”

Blake agrees and emphasizes that that initial connection has just strengthened: “We just had an instant connection that left me wanting more. And to this day, whether it's returning from a few hours golfing on the weekend or a weeklong work trip, when I get home and see her face, it brings me happiness. I feel at home with her, no matter where we are.”

The logical next step – marriage. As Taylor says, “I’m ready to marry Blake now because I feel confident in who I am and what I want out of life. I know without a doubt, Blake will be a great partner in life through the good and bad.”

And Blake agrees: “When I realized I was lucky enough to have found such a partner, it was really just a matter of time until I decided to make that permanent commitment. And so I’m excited and ready at this point in my life to take her hand and be able to call her my wife.”

In Praise of Truancy

On Friday, March 7, 2025, I officiated Juliana and Sacha’s wedding ceremony at the Marigny Opera House in New Orleans, Louisiana. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

I don’t think I have begun these remarks with this type of statement before: Juliana and Sacha’s love story speaks to the benefits of truancy. I see the raised eyebrows. Stay with me. It will make sense in a moment. 

Sacha says, “In the fall semester of my sophomore year of college in 2014 is where I met my wife Julz. Every Thursday, one of my classes had a film screening on a culturally classic film. I would skip this class quite often to play some soccer with my friends in the Boston Gardens. During one of these sessions, a friend of ours said he invited this cool chick he met during one of his classes. When going down the path to the Gardens, I saw Julz…” 

Juliana speaks to the magic of that moment: “Sacha does not believe me but I swear it was love at first sight for me, when I saw him I immediately was drawn to him. From that moment I showed my interest in him, we became closer friends and long story short we got together at 19 and never looked back.”

The impression they made on each other was mutual. Sacha says, “One of the first things I noticed was her smile. I decided to sit out playing soccer and just sit down with her and her friends. We hit it off immediately and instantly loved her energy, I found myself wanting to be around her all the time. At one point, she didn’t have her phone for a week and I stopped by her room almost everyday to see if she was there and if not, I would leave her a post it note.”

From the beginning, her relationship with Sacha had a profound effect on Juliana and helped her find herself. She says: “I began college a semester later than Sacha, so I entered my freshmen year still searching for my friend group where I would fit in and have the space to discover and be my true authentic self. I took a semester off to rediscover who I was after high school, that semester off and my first semester at Emerson was a pivotal year of discovering who I wanted to be. I met Sacha my second semester of college and at that time I was feeling confident in who I was and proud of the work I have done. Meeting Sacha felt like a gift given to me for that journey and he solidified that dream of the woman I was becoming.”

That sense of mutual growth and self-actualization has never stopped. In that sense, this moment is a capstone to their love story. Juliana says: “Being with Sacha since I was 19 meant we have had many life moments together and grew together. We always knew we would get married and now getting closer to 30 we felt that it was time to celebrate all those years of love together and enter true adulthood to plan the rest of our lives.”

Sacha agrees: “We have now been together for over ten years and it's again another joyous chapter of my life. After being together for a third of our lives, getting to an age where adulthood felt cemented, it made sense to take the next step into our relationship; making it official not just in the eyes of the law, but through a joyful and spiritual celebration of our union with all of our friends and family. Ten years is quite an achievement and celebrating our love feels natural to us.”

Sacrificial Love

On Saturday, February 22, 2025, I officiated Crystal and Michael’s wedding ceremony at St. Stephen's Catholic Church in Midland, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Crystal and Michael stress threads common to both of their upbringings when they talk about their parents.

Michael says: “As a veteran of the Yom Kippur War, my father chose to raise his two sons in the US. My father was a hard worker and willing to make many sacrifices for his family. He received his dental license in Poland but drove a taxi when coming to the US to study for his licensing in the US. My father left an impression on me to work hard to achieve what you want even though it may not be the shortest path.”  

Crystal says: “My mom and dad worked really hard to provide for my brother and myself. They were so young and had many financial struggles. My dad became a licensed electrician to provide for his family and my mom worked as a bookkeeper at a bank… My parents always wanting better for my brother and me.”

This love that their parents showed towards them is what we would call sacrificial love, and this idea is common to both of their religious traditions. In Christianity this idea is quite obvious, and it is exemplified in Jesus’ sacrifice. In Judaism, we see an example of this in the mystical idea of tzimtzum, literally contraction or withdrawal, in which God whose presence is everywhere, contracts to make room for creation.

Sacrificial love is central to marriage. In marriage, two people, each with their own characteristics, their own strengths and weaknesses, come together to form a union grounded in love. However, in order to thrive, each must not only take sustenance from the marriage, but give of themselves, so the other might thrive, so that the new being that comes to life, their marriage, may succeed. 

Crystal and Michael, what we hope for you is that you continue to follow your parents’ lessons, and that you love for each other be emblematic of God’s love for you. In this, may you find true happiness.

Shared Values

On Tuesday, December 31, 2024, Reverend Heather Mustain and I co-officiated Hannah and Chase’s wedding ceremony at the Las Colinas Country Club in Irving, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

How this relationship came to be is almost out of a rom com, which if you think about it is very apt for a New Year’s Eve wedding, New Year’s being all about new beginnings. 

Hannah and Chase were set up by Chase's cousin, Amber Leigh, who is Cash's mom. As Chase was moving back to Dallas, Amber Leigh thought he needed a girlfriend and had the perfect match in mind: Hannah. They hit it off over the phone, talking for weeks with effortless, long conversations, eagerly awaiting the chance to meet in person.

Hannah says, “I remember picking Chase up from the airport on our first date and being so nervous. The moment I saw him, I thought he was such a cutie. I loved that our outfits matched! It felt like we were already in sync!”

Chase says, “When I walked out of security, I saw the most joyful, and beautiful girl who ran up to me and gave me the biggest hug. I knew this was going somewhere… it didn't take me long to figure it out.”

What Hannah and Chase really teach us, though, is what matters spiritually in a relationship. Shared values are paramount.

Chase says, “I believe how people live and treat others is more important than the specific religion they follow. I value personal responsibility, integrity, and how one impacts the world around them. I align with the idea that morality, kindness, and purpose are universal values that transcend religious labels. Both in this life and after, is shaped by the character we build through daily actions.”

Hannah agrees: “My spiritual journey has been a tapestry of exploration and self-discovery. Growing up in a household that valued both tradition and open-mindedness, I was encouraged to ask questions and seek my own understanding of faith…

Respecting others and striving to be good people are core beliefs that we both hold dear. We believe in treating others with kindness and respect, and this shared value has created a harmonious and loving environment in our relationship.” 

Thank you, Hannah and Chase, for inspiring us not only in the wonderful way you met and began your relationship, but more importantly in how you live your lives, as individuals and as a couple.

Endlessly Grateful

On Friday, December 20, 2024, I officiated Jessica and Stephen’s wedding ceremony at the 4 Eleven in Fort Worth, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Jessica and Stephen teach us two important lessons, the power of good fortune, the good fortune they found in meeting each other, and the importance of a concrete foundation of friendship in the life of every romantic couple, a foundation they carefully cultivated at the beginning of their relationship.

Stephen describes the genesis of their relationship: “In August of 2022, Jessica came in to interview for a bartender position at the bar I was managing. We quickly became friends, though initially, I wasn’t ready for a romantic relationship… Fortunately, Jessica was patient, and we built a solid foundation of friendship over the next several months.” 

Jessica describes how they built that solid foundation: “We went on platonic dates, to the State Fair of Texas (where he assumed I knew my way around—I didn’t, and he would unintentionally lose me around corners), to concerts, where I assumed the role of passenger princess and requested unnecessary stops at In ‘N Out, to taking me out to lunch at Enchiladas Ole, when my cat (PB) was sick, and he knew I was at home worrying my head off, to then helping me chase said sick cat around my apartment because of a mandatory IV drip that had to be given because even the vet could not wrangle her. We bonded over shared experiences and small moments, and he made me laugh with his sense of humor. He also became a formidable foe in Wordle and remains one today.”

Jessica also describes what changed their relationship: “On Christmas Eve, 2022, my flight to visit my best friend was canceled due to an airline debacle, and Stephen invited me to spend the holiday with his family. Their warmth and hospitality were unforgettable, and that night marked a turning point in our relationship.”

Stephen confirms this, when he says, “We eventually started dating in February 2023. We moved in together shortly after.” And he adds, “It didn’t take long to know that I wanted to marry Jessica. By the time I was 35, I had a clear understanding of what I wanted in life, and she checked all the boxes… I knew that she was the one for me. In the spring of 2024, I proposed to her… I’m still not sure what I did to deserve so much love from such an amazing person, but I’m not going to question it.”

Jessica reflects this sentiment right back to Stephen: “Life hasn’t always been easy, but the challenges I’ve faced have shaped me into the person I am today… Meeting Stephen feels like a culmination of everything I’ve learned about love, resilience, and self-discovery. He came into my life at precisely the right time, and together, we’re building a future that feels hopeful and full of possibility… I am endlessly grateful…”.

Height of Serendipity

On Saturday, December 14, 2024, I officiated Julia and Matt’s wedding ceremony at The Breakers Palm Beach in Palm Beach, Florida. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Julia and Matt meeting each other was the height of serendipity. Julia says: “Matt and I met in Florida, when I was on vacation with my family one weekend. He was living there at the time as his work in solar moved him to the Sunshine State.” Matt adds: “Julia and I met in downtown Delray. I was out because my friend was DJing and of course Jules was there because she loves to dance. I actually almost didn’t go because I was exhausted from working all week but something inside me knew it was going to be a special time.” 

Julia says, “We locked eyes and started chatting. Matt was looking at me all night. I remember being instantly drawn to his goofy energy and his loud laugh.” Matt says that he noticed this pretty, tall, blonde girl kept staring at him and so he decided to take his best shot. Julia disputes this: “Matt will say that I was across the room looking at him, but I swear, he was the one staring at me!” I guess we will never know the truth, but it doesn’t really matter. Something unique happened the day Julia and Matt met. A day hasn’t gone by that they have not spoken ever since.  

Julia remembers being worried about how things would work out as the long-distance posed a tricky obstacle – her living in Connecticut and him living in Florida – but Matt wasn’t worried. The day after they first met, Matt told his mom, Bonnie, and his Uncle Greg that he had met the woman he was going to marry.  

When talking about Julia, Matt says, “She is the most special person I’ve ever met. We are both fiery personalities and when we are together, our flames burn the brightest. She inspires me to want to be a better person for her and our future children. I truly believe we were meant to be.”

When talking about Matt, Julia says: “After I met Matt, I felt like I could finally take a deep breath because everything was going to be okay. He is such a strong person and not just physically, although his muscles are easy on the eyes! His big smile and silly laugh always remind me not to take life or myself too seriously. I know that life with Matt will always be a beautiful adventure.” 

She adds that “Matt makes me feel understood, seen, loved, and safe…Well not always safe… like the time when he took me fishing on a boat in the middle of the ocean in the pouring rain with ten-foot waves and then caught a shark.”

In all seriousness, though, feeling seen may be the most important thing partners can do for each other. As Kirk Pineda writes, “Feeling seen is a state in which a part (or parts) of our identity, emotions, needs, and physical being are fully recognized and reflected back to us by another.” Julia and Matt, may you continue to mutually feel seen, loved, and at least while on dry land, safe too.

Listen to Your Heart

On Saturday, December 7, 2024, I officiated Brielle and Jared’s wedding ceremony at Rancho Luna Escondido in San Miguel de Allende, México. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Brielle describes the genesis of their relationship: “A little more than three years ago, my life took a turn for the better when I swiped right on Bumble and Jared, and I matched. As a huge fan of reality TV, particularly Bravo shows, I was immediately drawn to his profile when I saw that he shared this interest. We both were not great at responding on the apps, and Jared gave me his number to text.” 

Jared picks up the story from there: “When Brielle and I first started talking, I noticed she ended every sentence with at least one exclamation mark—sometimes up to five or six. I was struck by how upbeat and happy she seemed, even through text. I wouldn’t describe myself as the most cheerful person, so interacting with someone so genuinely positive was captivating. I later realized that this was her natural demeanor—she's truly one of the happiest people I've ever met.”

Their first date almost didn’t happen. Brielle says, “We started to text and tried to arrange a date. Jared had to reschedule our date…twice and even suggested that I could opt out if I wished. I joked and said, ‘Wow, already trying to get out of meeting me.’ As I joked, I figured why not try once more. Something in my gut told me to meet him, and I am grateful I followed that instinct.”

Following that instinct truly paid off. As Jared says, “Brielle and I have spent the last three years building a life together, sharing incredible highs and navigating serious lows... Throughout it all, we've been each other’s support system, confidant, cheerleader, and best friend. I truly couldn’t imagine a better partner or a happier life. I wake up every day feeling incredibly lucky and grateful to have found her.”

Brielle agrees: “Jared is my best friend, my soul mate, my home, and my partner in every adventure. We love exploring the world together, trying out restaurants as well as going to our usuals, watching movies, plays, and musicals, playing games… and simply enjoying each other’s company. Whether we are working out, taking walks, or binge-watching TV shows, every moment spent with him is filled with happiness, laughter, and even more love…” 

As a child of the 80s, I believe the lesson Brielle and Jared teach us is simple to me, as the Swedish duo Roxette put it years ago: 

“Listen to your heart

When he's calling for you

Listen to your heart

There's nothing else you can do

I don't know where you're going

And I don't know why

But listen to your heart

Before you tell him goodbye”

Thank you, Brielle and Jared, for this valuable lesson. Thank you for listening to your heart. May we all learn from your example.

Living Our Journey

On Saturday, November 30, 2024, I officiated Laura and Greg’s wedding ceremony at Shully's in Thiensville, Wisconsin. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Laura and Greg very much value this idea of lifelong learning. They see their journeys individually and with each other as journeys of learning. They try to live their lives in what one might call a teachable fashion, setting an example for their children. They see this moment, specifically, as a teachable moment. 

Greg recounts how it all started: “I met Laura (I call her Ella) in Clearwater Beach, Florida in March 2020. I was there on vacation with a college friend. Coincidentally and little did we know, we were staying at the same hotel as Ella. Ella and I met in the hotel gym at around noon on a weekday. Looking back, there is no question in my mind that Ella and I met due to divine intervention. There are dozens, if not hundreds, of factors, that I can list that would have prevented our meeting in the gym.”

Laura agrees and elaborates on the teachable aspect of this moment: “Greg offers me the safety and the sense of belonging together as if it was ‘beschert’ (meant to be). We share the same vision of a blended family and support each of our children in their endeavors. We both share a deep sense of familial connection and feel that marriage will offer our ‘kinder’ stability and balance. It shows them that marital commitment matters and that it is a key factor for their future...”

Greg talks about the nature of their relationship and what it does for each of them: “Ella and I have enjoyed a strong bond since we met that has blossomed into a special relationship. From the beginning, our relationship has been easy and organic. I made the decision to marry Ella after realizing that our partnership is stronger than the two of us individually. My life is better and has more meaning when Ella is part of it. I look forward to continuing my growth and fostering her growth within our partnership; that growth being the true act of love.”

Laura agrees and once again elaborates on the significance of this moment: “I firmly believe we humans are not meant to be islands. We need other humans to interact with and a partner to share our life with. In Greg, I found a partner who offers emotional support, a sense of belonging that makes every hardship in my life easier, and a great companion… We mutually complete each other. Our house watcher in Arizona refers to us Yin and Yang… 

We are all on this life train, living our journey. The truth is, we will all get off at different stations but until then, we need to be an example and build a legacy for generations to come… There is no such thing as a perfect life, but I do believe that there are perfect moments in time.”

Still Get Butterflies

On Saturday, November 16, 2024, Dr. Chris Girata and I co-officiated Emily and Spencer’s wedding ceremony at The Adolphus in Dallas, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Emily describes the genesis of their relationship, and how their platonic relationship took a romantic turn: “Spencer and I met in the summer of 2018… at a party in Dallas, and we became fast friends… Over the years I would come back to DFW to visit friends in the area, always excited to run into Spencer. 

That is when I developed a crush on him but never thought of the possibility of making it work long distance. Until he decided to ask me to be his girlfriend in the summer of 2019 before I went back to school again. I remember thinking hey, I like him, what do I have to lose? Turns out it was the best decision I have ever made.”

Spencer agrees with that last statement, as he explains why he wants to marry Emily: “I know that I’ve met my soulmate. She is all that’s good in the world. Emily is beautiful, smart, patient, loving and kind. She is everything that I could ask for in a wife. She is my best friend…”

Emily echoes some of Spencer’s language: “He is my biggest supporter, my best friend, my favorite person to do anything with. Every painful situation, errand, or negative aspect of life is instantly brightened with his presence. I still get butterflies even talking about him after almost five years of dating.” 

As a child of the 80s, I believe the lesson Emily and Spencer teach us is simple to me, as the Swedish duo Roxette put it years ago, “Listen to your heart.” Thank you, Emily and Spencer, for this valuable lesson. Thank you for listening to your heart. May we all learn from your example.

Always Have Fun in the Process

On Saturday, November 9, 2024, I officiated Emily and Bryson’s wedding ceremony at Warwick Melrose Hotel in Dallas, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

The beginning of their relationship almost didn’t. Begin, I mean. Emily says: “Bryson and I matched on Bumble, and I sent him a message that he later told me was not a good opening line, however, he still replied so how bad was it really? I said ‘heyy’ and he wrote back a comment about my Halloween costume – Maverick from Top Gun. A few days later, he asked me out for drinks and later admitted I was his second date of the day.”

Wow. I bet you too are wondering; how does he dig his way out of that one? I mean, obviously he did, because, duh, we’re here, but how?

Bryson says: “Fun side note, Emily was technically my second date of the day but the only one of the two that I actually cared about.”

Nice save, bro, nice save…

Emily continues: “The plan was to meet at Harwood arms. Bryson was 5 minutes early and I was 5 minutes late. I went home from the date thinking that this was either going to be the guy I married or the greatest heartbreak. Thankfully, it is the former.”

So, why does Emily want to marry Bryson? She says: “Bryson is the most genuine person I have met. He is true to himself and does not let the outside world affect him. We are very different people with very different backgrounds, but I believe that makes our relationship stronger. Since the day we met, we challenged each other. He makes me approach situations differently and we have a good balance… Bryson makes me a better person and provides new perspectives, and I hope I do the same for him.”

And why does Bryson want to marry Emily? He speaks of some of the same themes Emily does, but he also says this: “When I was starting my professional career, I had a conversation with a mentor and he asked me what I wanted from a job (I promise this is relevant to the question). Trying to sound thoughtful and engaged I came up with a few different ideas but as I was talking, he stopped me and said: ‘You want a job that is fun’... 

As time has gone on, I am more and more convinced he is right. More than that, however, I am fully convinced that it applies not just to my job but to my life and my relationship. And it is the main reason why I want to marry Emily.

Sometimes I think this answer is too simplistic and that I need a laundry list of reasons that I can rattle off when asked this question. But every time I think about it, I keep coming back to the fact that since the first night we met it has essentially been 3+ years of nonstop fun. Whether we are traveling, with family and friends, or just sitting in our living room with our dog, we find a way to have fun with each other. When I think of what I want in my life going forward, I could not think of anything better.”

What more can we wish for you, Emily and Bryson? May you continue to be genuine, balance each other out, make each other better, and always always have fun in the process.