In Israel , where I
grew up, when a couple tells you they are engaged, the customary response is, "תבנו בית נאמן"May
you build a faithful home." Now, I realize questioning idiomatic phrases
does not always make sense, but should an implicit question, at least be,
"How do we do THAT?" How do you build a faithful home? I believe if
we analyze how Heather and Tim built their relationship, we might just have the
answer.
I have often thought before,
that our children and certainly our grandchildren will find it extremely odd,
if someone tells them they did NOT meet their mate online. "What? You met
him without Tweeting each other first?! You weren't even friends on Facebook?!
Seriously?!" Heather and Tim are in that sense ahead of their time.
As Tim describes so well:
"Heather and I met one another in an online format. We communicated with
one another for approximately one month via email, text and phone prior to our
first meeting. I believe that this time to get to know one another, albeit not
in person, afforded us the opportunity to share a great deal about ourselves
and draw initial conclusions regarding our compatibility, without physical
attraction playing a major role in our initial impressions of one another.
Although I will say that she did look pretty hot in the pictures that she sent
to me."
Of course, advance
preparation is vital, but not sufficient. As Heather and Time built their
relationship, they invested time in having fun, in enjoying the good things
together, and in just enjoying togetherness. In dealing with challenges life
has thrown at them, they have been there for each other too, supporting each
other, and not being reticent of being supported either. Equally as important,
they have created an environment where their could get to know, appreciate and
love each other and each other's companionship.
Finally, they have openly
shared their faith traditions with each other, as they do in this ceremony. As
Tim recounts, "As we have grown in our relationship, we have had in depth
conversations regarding our religious beliefs and have had opportunities to
share insight as to how these beliefs have shaped our personalities and outlook
on life." This sharing has led to, in Tim's words, "a respect and
genuine interest in getting to know, and accompanying each other to our
respective religious services."
So, there you have it. How
do you build a בית נאמן , a faithful home?
Prepare for and build your relationship in advance and as you get to know each
other, revel in your companionship, and support each other in your challenges.
Finally, share your inner self and truly learn about your mate's inner self. It
worked for Heather and Tim, and it can work for you too...
No comments:
Post a Comment