Make Each Other Laugh

On Saturday, April 20, 2024, I officiated Julia and Grant’s wedding ceremony at the Woodbine Mansion in Round Rock, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Grant tells the story of how they met: “I met Julia very early on into our freshman year… Some of the friends I had all lived in the same dormitory. I spent a lot of time there studying, hanging out, and meeting up for nights out. It wasn’t too long into the start of the year that Julia and her roommates began to tag along with us. 

Almost immediately, Julia and I developed a very strong bond between just the two of us. We spent a lot of time discussing and going to the movies, getting lunch in the food halls, bar hopping, and attending house parties, and about two months into the first semester, we began dating.” Sounds credible, I suppose.

Julia’s story is a little more, I say this advisedly, colorful: “When I first met Grant… he was by far the loudest in the room and was making everyone laugh until they cried. He seemed like a complete goofball. Over time my friends started to hang out with his friends and our little groups happened to combine and spend a lot of time together. 

The first thing we talked about were horror movies. He told me his favorites, and I didn’t mention the fact that horror movies give me night terrors, rather I agreed and told him how much I love horror movies too. We started to go see movies together, sometimes one a week, sometimes three times a week. We would talk for hours after about the different elements of each movie. After a while we did everything together.”

OK, let’s get serious now. Julia says: “Grant has seen me through the absolute worst moments of my life and has been there every step of the way… He has always kept me afloat. He is my rock… I couldn’t imagine living my life with anyone else but Grant. I couldn’t have prayed for a better man, best friend, or partner to live out the rest of my life with.”

Grant says: “Julia is by far my greatest friend… She is my favorite person in the entire world. I’ve known this from the moment I first met her, and this feeling only grows stronger with each passing year that we have been together. She never ceases to make me laugh when I need it. She’s always there for me when I need help or someone to lean on. She’s tough on me when she knows I need a push to achieve my full potential.”

Did you notice one very important common element they each cite? They each emphasize the ability of the other to make them laugh. That is so important. 

The Talmud, the central book of our faith, tells a story of a rabbi to whom the Prophet Elijah would appear from time to time. He is walking through the market, and he asks Elijah if any of those present in the market are guaranteed a spot in the Next World. Elijah points to two brothers and says that they are. The rabbi then asks them what they do. They say that they make people laugh. If anyone is feeling down, they cheer them up with their humor. 

Julia and Grant, that is a great lesson for marriage. If you can make each other laugh, you can usually get through anything, so keep it up, now and for many years to come.

Rom Com

On Sunday, April 14, 2024, I officiated Molly and Rani’s wedding ceremony at The Springs at Tuscany Hill in Anna, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Most couples today meet online. Molly and Rani met the old-fashioned way, IRL, as they say. Rani’s description sounds like it is out of a rom com: “I’ll never forget that she came up to me and asked me if I was going to ask her for her phone number as my friend moments before, told me that she likes me. It was funny, as one of my best friends also liked her, so I asked how he would feel if I went for it, and he said that he gave me his blessing.”

Molly continues the rom com theme: “I knew from the second that I met him that he was going to be my husband. I don’t know what it was about him, but he just had something that caught my eye. The first time we spent time together, it felt like I knew him my whole life. I felt so comfortable and so safe with him.”

Rom coms never have the couple meet and then ride off into the sunset. That would just be boring. True to theme, Rani continues: “I told her in the beginning that I was not interested in getting married. (Ouch!) Little did I know that about a year later I would propose to her, knowing that if I didn’t propose, I might lose the opportunity to have not only a beautiful wife, but an amazing mother that would nurture my future kids, help me through the rough patches, and make it through to the other side.”

Molly agrees and says this is mutual, the lesson being obvious; if you are lucky enough and play your cards right, rom coms can become reality: “I want to marry Rani, because not only is he my best friend, but he’s my biggest supporter, constantly motivating me to be better. He has given me everything I could ever dream of. He is truly the definition of what a husband and a man should be. Every day is better than the day before with him. He continues to give me all the butterflies and all the smiles and laughs a woman could dream of. And that is why I can’t wait to marry him.”

Shifting Your Mindset

On Saturday, April 6, 2024, Mother Maddie Hill and I co-officiated Bailey and Nate’s wedding ceremony at Bowie House in Fort Worth, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Bailey recounts a wonderful method she grew up with for sussing out if a guy is worth it: “My mom taught me to make a list of qualities in a man, write them down and check on them every once in a while, when dating. My list was: Kind, funny, family man/family oriented, my kind of weird (hard to explain), raised similarly to the way I was, loving supportive parents, and motivated professionally.” 

The Jewish equivalent of this is so much simpler. It goes like this: Are they a doctor, a lawyer, or an accountant? 

Seriously, though, Bailey continues: “This gave me guidelines to find a partner that would not only love me and I love them, but would be a great father to our children, and treat me and his future family with respect. And Nate is that through and through.” That seems like a great lesson for all of us in how we should develop relationships, romantic or otherwise.

Speaking of lessons. Nate shares how meeting Bailey taught him a very important lesson about life, utterly changing him, reordering his priorities, and showing him what was really important: “I am very lucky to have found Bailey. [Before meeting Bailey] I spent… time chasing superficial things of very low value… Every decision was about what would bring me immediate satisfaction… But after coming to Fort Worth and meeting Bailey, my attitude, without me even knowing, changed to what will make me happy in the long term… 

After falling in love with Bailey, my mindset shifted from what I am going to do tomorrow to what I am going to do with her next year and beyond…  I love her very deeply, and I already love the family I picture for us very deeply, and so I want to marry her because I do not see another way to be happy without them.”

And Bailey agrees: “Nate will be a loving husband, a wonderful father, and the funniest weirdest most fun best friend a girl could ever have. I am incredibly lucky to have him by my side for the rest of our lives.”

Savor the Journey

On Saturday, March 23rd, I officiated Lindsay and David’s wedding ceremony at Winfrey Point in Dallas, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Lindsay and David dated briefly in high school, but Lindsay describes what led to their real relationship years later: “During my first year of neurology residency in 2013, I was having a conversation with my mom, and she randomly asked me how David was doing.” So, thank you, Michelle, for instigating what brought us here today. 

Lindsay continues: “It was then I realized it had been several years since I last spoke with him. So, I decided to reach out to David over Facebook, and I invited him to brunch at Breadwinners. While David says it wasn’t an actual date, I felt differently at the time, even though he did make me pay for my own meal.”

In fairness to David, he was just being cautious. He says, “While I was hesitant as to her intentions (possibly looking for a free meal as a starving med student), I willingly met her, where I instantly rekindled my attraction and fondness for her.  Soon this date turned into three, which turned into even more.”

Lindsay and David dated for about ten eventful years before they took the plunge. They settled down, and as David says, he “could finally propose with a permanent banner of our ten years together hanging in our bedroom, and where we could finally marry and raise our family together, forever, as we always intended to do.”

And Lindsay said yes. As she says, “We had been together so long and we had been through so much together, I naturally said yes, since it was clearly the right time to finally make it official.” 

I think there are two important lessons in Lindsay and David’s relationship. Number one, if you ever get a second chance in life, go for it, take it, don’t hesitate. Number two, once you do take that chance, take your time if you need to, practice patience, savor the journey, until you arrive in the promised land.

This worked out well for Lindsay and David. As Lindsay says, “We are excited to continue to share our lives together and start a family in the near future, where we can raise our future children with the same beliefs and care we had growing up.” 

And as David says, “Now, I get to continue these traditions with my future wife in our home with our future children, in hopes we can pass on the same customs and beliefs we grew up with when we were children.