Monday, September 23, 2019

Lessons of Your First Date

Sunday evening, I officiated Roman and Brittany’s wedding ceremony at One Preston Events Venue, in Gunter, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Roman’s telling of his first date with Brittany is the kind of account that makes you go, “Awwww.”: “I was so excited to first meet her. When we first met, I was nervous. Her beauty was mesmerizing.” That is, until you hear the record scratch, “I had homework to do, and she was very understanding. She let me do it on our first date!” It’s not exactly the stuff of bodice rippers...

Let’s get serious for a second, though. Brittany provides some further context: “Our first date was at Buffalo Wild Wings and was rather spontaneous as we weren't supposed to hang out that night. Roman had just started school at UNT and even though he had homework he agreed to meet me for a drink as long as I didn't mind him finishing up a quiz on the date.”

I think there are actually a number of great lessons for life and marriage in this very first IRL interaction of Brittany and Roman. First of all, the easiest lesson, context matters. Second, and more importantly, as the journalist David Plotz, has said, other people’s marriage is like a foreign country. What doesn’t make sense in one country makes total sense in another. 

Third, and most importantly, Brittany and Roman teach us that this world is much less about imagined idyllic ideal interactions, than it is about real messy down-to-earth living. The best parts of any relationship, as well as its true test, are found in just those moments. 

Brittany and Roman, keep those lessons of your first date in mind, and you’ve got it made.

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