Thursday, March 31, 2011

Lucky

I recently wrote personal remarks for two different weddings based on aspects from the song “Lucky”. One wedding was a few weeks ago, and the other is yet to come. Here are the remarks from a few weeks ago:

When I was contemplating Allison and Zach's relationship, I said to myself, wow, this is one lucky couple. The words of a song by Jason Mraz immediately came to mind. Mraz, in a beautiful duet by Colbie Cailet sings words that could have been written just for Allison and Zach. “Lucky I'm in love with my best friend, lucky to have been where I have been… They don't know how long it takes waiting for a love like this, every time we say goodbye I wish we had one more kiss. I'll wait for you, I promise you I will… Lucky to be coming home again, lucky we're in love in every way, lucky to have stayed where we have stayed, lucky to be coming home someday…”

Why do I say this could have been written just for them? Well, there are a number of reasons. Allow me to enumerate the top two. First of all, this is just a lucky couple, not lucky in the sense of random dumb luck, rather lucky in the sense of fortunate to be surrounded by family and friends that not only care deeply for them, but even brought them together.

Second, these are not two individuals that just go with the flow. They are much more reflective than the average person. This allowed them to have the type of deep discussions they had at the beginning of their relationship, a type most couples get too much later. This truly enabled them to become best friends in the true sense of the word, at the same time that they became lovers. They did not stop there. It is well evident that they continued and continue to this day to help each other grow, and so with three years under their belt they share a closeness that some couples do not achieve in many many years together.

So, Allison and Zach, thank you. Thank you for reminding us just how lucky we can be if we are so fortunate to find our soul mates, and how we can help each other grow, and reach our full potential as individuals and as a couple. Hold on to that. Now look into each other’s eyes. As the years go by, make sure you take a moment here and there to stop and look into each other’s eyes like you are now. Then wherever you are, whatever is going on in your life, say to yourself, say to each other, in the words of Jason Mraz, “I keep you with me in my heart; you make it easier when life gets hard; lucky I'm in love with my best friend.”

Monday, March 28, 2011

A Good and Simple Life

This last Saturday I officiated the wedding of Sarah and Brian in Corpus Christi. This special couple was brought together through the tragedy of the death of a mutual friend. In fact, they saw him as their honorary best man. Here are the personal remarks I shared with them during their ceremony:

Sarah and Brian were brought together by tragedy. A dear mutual friend lost his life. Anyone who has experienced such tragedy knows that one of the basic human reactions one invariably has is to ask why. Why did this happen to my loved one? This question can nag and gnaw at the heart, and therein lies a problem. You see, try as we may, with a loss of such finality, we can never really find an answer to that question. Depending on one’s theological stance, there may be no reason, or they may be a reason that is not in the realm of human understanding. To us it is all the same. We are left in the dark.

There is great hope though, if you follow the example of Sarah and Brian. What Sarah and Brian did, in words and in action, was realize that moving forward entailed asking another very different question, and that is, what now. Now that I have experienced tragedy, what shall I do? I can’t and never will know why it happened, but what meaning shall I give to that tragedy? What meaning shall I give to my life henceforth? This is a question that is entirely answerable; this is a question that we must answer, each one of us.

Now each person has to give his or her own answer to what their life’s meaning will be. That said, there can be a basic common sketch that most of us can follow on the road to true meaning, a sketch Sarah and Brian have tried to live by. We can find true meaning through loving, through being loved, through savoring life to the fullest, and through being of service to others. Examine Sarah and Brian’s lives as individuals and as a couple, and you will see these four threads create the fabric of what Brian aptly calls, “a good and simple life.”

So, Sarah and Brian, thank you. Thank you for reminding us how one can and should live. May you and may we continue on that path to truly meaningful lives of loving, being loved, savoring life and being of service to others.