This last weekend I officiated Rachel and Eric’s wedding ceremony at the Ritz Carlton in
. Rachel and Eric’s families have known each other since before Rachel was born, and here they were many years later marrying. How cool is that? Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests: Dallas, Texas
One of the first things I always ask every couple is how they met. Most couples have met two or three years before, others met in college, some are high school sweethearts. Every now and then I come across the couple that met in one of those settings, lost contact, and they reconnect years later. Imagine my surprise when Rachel and Eric told me that essentially they have known each other since Rachel was born, and that their families have been close from before Rachel was born.
Of course, then I had to ask, and I have a feeling others have wondered this too, what happened, what changed back in 2009? They acknowledge this when Rachel says: "It's funny to go back and look at pictures and videos from my early childhood and see Eric and me together. Who knew that many years later we would be getting married?!" This question becomes especially acute, when you hear them each describe the depth of love and mutual admiration this couple has. Let me give you a taste of that:
Here is what Rachel says about Eric:
"Eric treats his mom like (so well)... He is handy around the house... He is, hands down, the nicest person I have ever met; he doesn't have a bad thing to say about anyone. He is annoyingly athletic, handsome, optimistic, intelligent, driven, supportive, patient, calm, and everything I've ever wanted in a future husband. He makes me a better person.
Eric gushes about Rachel too, and says:
“In a lot of ways, she is the opposite of me, and that’s what I really like about her. She is outgoing, where I am more reserved. She is more creative, where I am more numbers oriented... She seems to even me out. She is an extremely caring individual and will do anything for the people she loves. On top of this all, she is incredibly smart and challenges me to think about things in different ways."
So what is it? What changed? What caused them to suddenly see each other in a different light? What is the cause of such epiphany moments? Now, being a rabbi and all, you probably expect me to have some type of brilliant answer. Frankly, what can I say, I don't. I don't know that anyone does.
The more important question though, is not why, but what. What do you do when you have that epiphany moment? What do you do when you can see something you couldn’t see before, something that has the potential to be wonderful? This is an important question, since I think that many of us, if we are honest, have more epiphany moments in life, than we care to admit even to ourselves. And the fact is that most of the time, we don’t act on them, because epiphany moments can be scary. Change – even good change, even wonderful change – can be very uncomfortable, and the warm comfort of inertia, is extremely tempting.
The lesson that Rachel and Eric teach us with their story is that it need not be so. You CAN overcome that fear, you CAN follow your heart, you CAN answer the call of the moment, and dare to venture out on a new path. So next time you hesitate, next time you are tempted by the wet blanket of inertia, think about that. Think about Rachel and Eric's example, and live your dreams.